Accessible Intimacy
Intimacy is a unique journey for everyone, regardless of whether you have a disability or not.
As someone who's Deaf and has Ménière's disease myself, I bring firsthand understanding to sex and disability. My own journey has instilled in me a deep appreciation for the beauty and richness of inclusive and accessible sex.
I've completed the Professional Disability Awareness Training with Touching Base. Touching Base is a not-for-profit organisation that promotes sexual and physical intimacy being core to the human experience. They provide a referral system that connects people with disability to the services of sex industry professionals.
As a disabled person myself, and being on the Touching Base committee of management and a referred provider, I have extensive experience providing services to clients with diverse disabilities – physical, intellectual, and neurodivergent. From providing physical accommodations to fostering open communication, I prioritise creating safer, affirming spaces where everyone feels valued and sexy.
People with disability deserve to experience intimacy and pleasure.
There's a pervasive misconception that disability and sexuality are mutually exclusive. This harmful stigma suggests that disabled people aren't inherently desirable or capable of experiencing intimacy and pleasure. As a sex worker with disability, I'm intimately familiar with this discrimination. My deafness has led to instances where potential clients hesitate to book my services, erroneously assuming that my disability somehow detracts from my ability to provide fulfilling experiences.
Being a sex worker is so exciting because I love to transcend conventional ideas of sex. The notion that sex equals penetrative intercourse excludes so many people’s experiences and desires. Intimacy is so incredibly diverse and the possibilities are endless.
We can share sensual massage, explore different parts of the body through touch, indulge in verbal fantasies or embrace the richness of emotional intimacy. Each booking is an opportunity for exploration and a chance to redefine what intimacy means on our own terms.
Sexuality is a diverse and multifaceted aspect of human existence, encompassing a wide spectrum of desires, preferences, and identities. Nobody should be denied the opportunity to embrace their sexuality and experience pleasure simply because they have a disability. Whether physical, sensory, or cognitive, disability does not negate one's sexual agency or diminish the significance of intimate connections.
The stigma surrounding disability and sex couldn't be more unfounded. Disability does not diminish one's capacity for sexual expression or the ability to derive pleasure from intimacy. It's essential to recognise that people with disability, like everyone else, have a fundamental right to explore and enjoy our sexuality without judgement or barriers.
“I am a blind man who enjoyed the executive touch session with Katia (at Bliss). Much enjoyed including the time in the bath chatting and having my body massaged gently; pleasurable in a nice way.”
John
Accessible Services.
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I believe everyone, regardless of disability, deserves access to intimacy - if they want it. My services are designed for inclusivity and my packages and pricing remain the same for everyone (see my menu page for more information). Whether you're seeking companionship, sensual massages, or simply exploration, I'm here to guide you.
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Speaking is not a determining factor in a person’s agency or ability to consent - neither is having a disability. There are so many ways to communicate that don’t involve speech. As someone who is fluent in Auslan, I use gestures and sign language to communicate every day. Being Deaf is a super power, because it allows for nuanced expression and understanding, enabling us to establish mutual consent and boundaries without relying on verbal communication.
In addition to Auslan, I can also provide visual communication cards during sessions. You’ll just need to let me know to bring these along if they’re needed. These cards offer a simple yet effective way for clients to express their desires, preferences, and boundaries visually, ensuring that their consent is actively and respectfully sought throughout our interaction.
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Absolutely! Limited mobility in your arms and hands doesn't have to hinder your ability to experience intimacy and pleasure. There are countless ways to explore and enjoy sexual experiences that don’t involve the use of your hands.
Exploring various positions and techniques is super fun, and some of the best sexual experiences I’ve had are with people who have limited mobility. We have the opportunity to get a little more creative and can experiment with using different parts of your body, such as your legs, hips, or mouth, to engage in intimate activities.
Additionally, the use of assistive devices or adaptations can further enhance your sexual experience. From adding pillows and wedges to adaptive sex toys and harnesses, there are so many ways we can have sex! Remember, there is no one-size-fits-all approach to sex, and pleasure comes in many forms. Whether you're seeking physical touch, sensual massage, or other forms of intimate connection, there are plenty of fun and sexy activities to explore.
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Sexual dysfunction or difficulty achieving and maintaining an erection is a common experience for many people at some point in their lives, regardless of disability. However, it's important to recognise that sex encompasses a wide range of intimate activities beyond penetrative intercourse. Whether or not you can maintain an erection is of absolutely no concern to me.
There are so many ways to experience pleasure and intimacy with me. Sensual touch, kissing, cuddling, and exploring erogenous zones can all contribute to a fulfilling sexual experience. Additionally, oral sex, mutual masturbation, and the use of sex toys can provide alternative avenues for pleasure. Remember, sex is about connection, pleasure, and intimacy, and there's no, singular "right" way to experience it. Embrace experimentation and creativity, and we can focus on finding what feels good for you.
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Whether you've had zero or limited sexual experience, you are completely welcome and deserving of a fulfilling and enjoyable sexual encounter. And I’m here to create a safe, non-judgmental space where you can explore and discover your sexuality at your own pace. Your level of experience doesn't define your worth or your ability to engage in intimacy.
Many people seek out my services because they haven't had sex before or feel unsure about their sexual abilities. My role can be to provide guidance, support, and expertise to help you feel comfortable in your sexual exploration. If you like, we can take things slow, communicate openly about your desires and boundaries, and explore new sensations and experiences together. Whether you're looking to learn more about your own body, practice intimacy, or simply enjoy the pleasure of touch, I'm here to explore it with you.
Your comfort, consent, and satisfaction are incredibly important to me, so please feel welcome to discuss any concerns or questions you may have beforehand or in the booking. Remember, there's no pressure to perform or meet any expectations – this is your journey, and I'm here to support you!
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A little pee or poop never hurt anybody - so this is a non-issue for me. There’s a huge difference between a client who is purposely being unhygienic out of disrespect, versus a client who has a little accident in a booking. I always approach each client with empathy, understanding, and respect for your individual circumstances. Sometimes I even have a little, playful laugh with my clients and switch to the role-play of a ‘naughty nurse’ ready to clean you up! I understand that issues with bladder and bowel control are a natural part of life for many people with disability, and they in no way detract from your right to experience pleasure and intimacy.
I'm prepared to handle any situation with professionalism and discretion. If necessary, we can take precautions such as using waterproof bedding or towels - just let me know beforehand if it’s likely to occur and we can work around it.
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Absolutely! I have many friends and clients who have limited mobility with their arms and/or hands, and I frequently spoon feed them mouthfuls of food and hold their straw to their lips. I can help you out with my hand mobility - and perhaps you can help me out with ordering/listening to the wait-staff!
Accessible Locations.
Thinking of making a booking with me, but unsure where it would take place? Usually I only see clients in hotels, however I do make special accommodations to attend the homes of people with disability. This is because I understand that leaving the house for some people may not be accessible. Have a read through these frequently asked questions if you’re looking for accessible locations to host your booking.
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Bliss on Crown is a massage parlour located on Crown Street in Woolloomooloo. I work there in addition to providing services independently, which is reflected in the ‘Bliss Experience’ package on my menu page.
Accessing the front door of Bliss involves navigating a couple of external steps, which unfortunately makes it inaccessible for people using wheelchairs or walking frames. All rooms and bathrooms are situated upstairs in a winding, terrace-style complex. While there's one room located on the ground floor, it's important to note that it's not entirely accessible either, as it requires navigating two steps leading to a shower that may be inaccessible as it is quite small and often slippery.
In terms of sensory experience, the rooms at Bliss offer adjustable lighting ranging from dim to bright, and music can be adjusted or turned off completely according to your preferences. There are no coloured lights, strong smells, or itchy textures. Additionally, each room is equipped with air conditioning, and we’ll have control over the temperature settings for our room.
The Bliss massage tables are approximately 1.2 metres off the floor, and I'm experienced in assisting people to get onto the table safely. I'm also mindful of using minimal oil during massages to prevent slipping.
Please feel free to reach out to myself or Bliss if you have any specific questions or requirements regarding accessibility.
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If disability prevents you from booking a hotel or if going to a hotel presents challenges for physical intimacy, I'm more than happy to provide my services in the comfort of your own home. Please let me know this during the booking process, as I only offer services to a client’s home if they are disabled. Please remember that it's important that we conduct our session in a different room or part of the house from your support staff, family, and/or flatmates.
Of course, if you're able to book a hotel, I would much prefer to provide the service there. Hotels often offer a more neutral, clean and comfortable setting for intimate encounters, allowing us to fully focus on your pleasure and relaxation.
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I will not travel more than 2km outside of Sydney CBD. If your home is further than 2km outside of the CBD, we may need to negotiate a travel fee or I may need to decline the booking. Due to my disability, I am unable to drive - so unfortunately travelling long distances pose an accessibility issue for me.
It’s also important to note that my standards of cleanliness are well above the average person, and my neurodivergence makes it incredibly difficult for me to be comfortable in a space that I deem unsanitary or untidy. To give you an idea, I’ve even left my personal friend’s homes promptly after arriving because of physical symptoms associated with untidiness and poor hygiene. My friends aren’t particularly messy humans - I’m just extremely particular. As such, it would be impossible for me to comfortably conduct a sexual service in a space which doesn’t meet my hygiene needs.
I am quite blunt, and will be upfront with my discomfort with you if I can’t go ahead with the booking in the event that your home is unclean or untidy. Some people may find this a little confrontational, especially if you’ve been looking forward to the booking. So if you’re someone that would feel anxious about this potentially happening, or you know your home isn’t particularly tidy - please book a hotel. I don’t want to seem offensive with the above sentiment, I’m simply neurodivergent myself - and I categorise this requirement as an accessibility need.
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Yes, I do! I have an extensive list of both restaurants and hotels (with reviews) at the very bottom of this page. Please scroll down to view them.
Support Staff and Assistance.
Are you a person with disability who has support staff that may need to assist prior to the booking? Or perhaps you are a family member, friend or support worker booking on behalf of a disabled person. This section of frequently asked questions and answers is for you!
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For the privacy and comfort of both of us, it's important that your support staff does not remain in the room during our session. However, if you have line-of-sight care plans in place, your support staff can provide me with signs to watch out for and can wait outside the room. This way, our privacy is maintained, and if there's any need for assistance or communication during the session, I can easily approach your support worker.
Just like every client, your comfort and confidentiality are extremely important to me. People with disability deserve the right to privacy, especially during intimate settings.
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The approach to assisting with transferring from your wheelchair to the bed depends on various factors, including your body weight and personal preferences.
As I am relatively small, weighing under 60kg myself, my capacity to assist with moving someone depends on their body weight. If you're within a weight range that I can comfortably lift, I'm more than happy to assist with the transfer. Some people prefer the involvement of their support person for manual assistance. In such cases, your support worker can handle the transfer and then step out once you're settled.
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I'm more than willing to assist you in the shower during independent bookings. However, in bookings at Bliss - you’ll either need to book an “Executive Touch” service or understand that the shower will be included in the booking time. This is because I have little control over the booking structure at Bliss.
On another note, I completely understand if you feel more comfortable having your support worker assist you with showering instead of me. Occasionally, some of my disabled clients prefer to maintain the 'sexy' mood during our session, and as such, they opt for their support worker to assist with showering. If you choose to have your support worker assist you in the shower, I'm happy to wait nearby and provide any additional assistance or support as needed. Ultimately, the decision is yours!
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If you're making a booking on behalf of your disabled friend, family member or client - it's essential that the person with a disability has actively chosen to engage with me or has expressed a preference for someone with my specific description and vibe. It's important that the decision to see me specifically is made by the individual themselves, and not made because you think I’m suitable, attractive and/or your type. If you are not able to ascertain that the person with disability wants to see me, and specifically me - I will not accept the booking.
In your initial enquiry via my booking form, please provide the following information:
Your Details: Your name, the disabled person's name, and details about the nature of their disability and any specific access needs they may have. Please also inform me about their communication style, whether verbal, Auslan or otherwise.
Location: Let me know where the person is located, and if they're able to see me at Bliss on Crown, if they'd prefer to book a hotel, or if they would like me to provide services at their house.
Sexual Experience: Please indicate whether the person has prior experience with sex and if they have seen a sex worker before.
Additional Booking Information: Include all other necessary booking details (like every other client enquiry) such as your phone number or email address, where you found my profile (e.g., my website, escorting website), the desired location for the service (hotel/restaurant/location), the preferred package from my menu, the duration of the session, and potential dates and times.
After you submit a booking request, the client you are booking on behalf of will need to be screened in the same way I determine the suitability of every other client. As you are making the booking, I may also need a copy of your legal identification and emergency contact details if the booking progresses.
Conflicting Accessibility Needs.
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My criteria for seeing disabled clients is no different to seeing clients without a disability. What matters most to me is that the person is kind, respectful of my boundaries, and generous in their interactions with me, including respecting my pricing.
There are no disabilities that I wouldn't see. However, there may be instances where I decline bookings made by individuals with whom I am actively engaged with in the deaf or disabled community. This decision is not based on their disability, but rather because they know me personally. This criteria applies equally to hearing or non-disabled clients. For example, if you're a deaf person who doesn't know me personally or closely within the deaf community, I'd be more than happy to see you. However, if we regularly interact at deaf events or have a close connection within the community, I may decline the booking as this may feel too personal for me.
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As someone who is profoundly Deaf, my primary access need revolves around communication. I wear hearing aids, can use spoken words and I’m also fluent in Auslan. While you don’t need to know sign language to communicate with me, I do rely on lip-reading. Therefore, it's important for me to be able to see your lips when you are speaking. Please refrain from wearing masks or covering your face during our interaction, and ensure that you speak clearly and without mumbling. You don't need to adjust your speaking pace or volume, but if you are a fast talker, slowing down a bit can help facilitate clearer communication. I'll let you know if any adjustments are necessary during our conversation.
In addition to being Deaf, I also have a balance disorder called Ménière's disease, which is the underlying cause of my deafness. Because of this, I sometimes struggle with stairs and may need to hold onto a rail. I may also move a bit slower and may appear ‘shaky’ at times. Ménière's disease can also present in sporadic and uncontrolled attacks, which may manifest as falls or drops to the ground, or vomiting. These episodes occur unexpectedly, but I'm usually completely fine afterwards. Sometimes this does happen in a booking, and usually my clients are super shocked and worried, especially during sex! But please don’t worry - I typically handle these situations with humour and resilience.
If you haven’t already noticed by my meticulous attention to detail, I am also neurodivergent. My neurodivergence means that I can be a little too ‘honest’ or blunt. Although, this is a characteristic that is also prevalent in Deaf culture. My extreme attention to detail particularly manifests in matters of cleanliness, which tends to shape my professional practice. For this reason, I choose to conduct bookings exclusively in hotels, Bliss on Crown or designated spaces conducive to maintaining meticulous standards of hygiene. Exceptions are made for clients with disabilities that don’t have access to these locations, however please see the above FAQ regarding bookings within your home for my (once again) blunt answer.
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In the rare instance where there's a clash between my access needs and yours, we can find solutions! Disabled people are extremely resourceful, and we are continuously adapting to exist in the “abled world” - so why can’t we make it work between us? For example, if you have a speech difference that makes it challenging for me to understand through lip reading, we can explore alternative communication methods. Utilising technology for translation, visual communication cards or written communication can be practical solutions.
The only combination of disabilities that might present a significant challenge for me is when a client has both an intellectual disability and a speech difference. In such cases, successful communication often depends on patience and adaptability from the client.
I've encountered situations in the past where clients understandably felt frustrated when I struggled to comprehend their spoken word because of my deafness. While I’ll always find ways to accommodate diverse needs, I recognise that there may be instances where our communication styles may conflict and as such, we may not be a good match.
What happens when my disability and my access needs conflicts with yours? If you’re unsure as to whether our disabilities will be compatible, it’s important to read this section before enquiring for a booking.
Accessible Hotel Recommendations.
Accessible Hotel Recommendations.
I’m not a wheelchair user, so I can’t comment on the experience of these locations myself. Prior to booking any of these suggestions (or any hotel), please contact them to make sure they are accessible for you. I’m not responsible for the accessibility of the hotel - I’m just putting together these suggestions to help you as much as I can.
During my research, I connected with my friends who are wheelchair users, and the broader disability community in Sydney - however not all of the below options are tried and tested. There may also be more accessibility features for each room that are not listed below, so again - please contact the hotel for more information. If you are a wheelchair user and have any feedback regarding the following recommendations (or have more/different options), please get in touch as I am keen to expand this list and make it as accurate as possible.
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I absolutely love the Crown Towers, and they have accessible rooms too - which is a bonus as I can see my clients with disability there too. You’ll need to make sure that you book an accessible room, I recommend the ‘Deluxe Accessible King’ room which has the following features:
Spacious roll-in shower with dual shower-heads and marble shower seat.
Wheelchair accessible vanity in the bathroom.
Custom King size bed with low bed height.
Individual room temperature control, with lowered light switches and in-room tablets with connectivity to blinds, lights and in-room dining.
Phone for low vision/blind guests.
Television with closed captioning.
I also love the Crown Towers, because there are many wheelchair accessible restaurants located in the hotel - or we can order room service!
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The Capella Hotel is gorgeous, and they have a whole section dedicated to accessible rooms on their website. There are three accessible room types; Deluxe, Premier and the Deluxe Suite. The accessible features include:
Rooms are wheelchair accessible and are step-free.
In-room tablet that controls temperature, curtains and lights.
The specially designed bathrooms include a larger shower with handrails.
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The Raddison Blu is known for their accessibility features, and have had a number of positive reviews for accessibility. Though, not all of their rooms are accessible, so please email reception at res.sydplaza@radisson.com to book an accessible room with the features that you require. Here is a list of their accessible room features that I’ve collated:
Wheelchair-accessible lobby, public entrance and public restrooms. Wheelchairs are also available on request if you are an ambulant user.
Amenities within accessible range to reach.
Audio emergency warning devices.
Closed captions on television.
Controls operable without grasping or twisting, and there is lever hardware installed.
The bathroom has wide doorways and there are grab bars alongside the toilet. There is a roll-in shower, and a bench seat in shower available.
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The location of the Four Seasons Sydney hotel is ideal for wheelchair users or people with mobility restrictions with accessible transport just across the road. You can also pre-select accessible rooms when booking on their website. You can choose between four different accessible rooms; Superior City (it doesn’t say this has wheelchair access), Deluxe City, Premier Full Harbour Club and Deluxe Full Harbour. The rooms with wheelchair access features have:
The hotel has easy access throughout with ramps, lifts and accessible restrooms on all levels.
Access to the room is via a lowered key card activation pad which opens the door.
The room has space for manoeuvring a wheelchair.
Air conditioning controls, light switches and wardrobe facilities are all at a height for wheelchair users.
The bathroom is spacious and well equipped with grab rails throughout, hand-held shower head and flip-down shower seat.
The bathroom also has a wheelchair accessible shower.
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The West Hotel is part of the Hilton chain, but slightly more modern and has a series of accessible rooms. The Queen Acacia and Queen Banksia both have accessible options available upon request, which feature the following:
Wheelchair accessible entry and an automatic lockable door.
The rooms have lowered light switches and thermostat controls, lowered peephole in door and a lowered vanity in the bathroom.
The bathroom is also wheelchair accessible, and has a roll-in shower.
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The Crown Plaza has approximately 4 accessible rooms, however they don’t seem to have an easily accessible booking system to select an accessible room when purchasing. I would suggest emailing them at sydsh@ihg.com to get more information. Here’s what information I have gathered on the hotel and accessible rooms:
There is on-site disabled parking. There is step-free access throughout the hotel, however according to reviews, apparently doors throughout the hotel are not easy to open.
All door widths are at least 80cm wide and all hallway widths are at least 91cm wide.
There is wide clearance to get a wheelchair near the bed, and the bed is 70cm high.
A bed hoist is not automatically provided, but apparently you can hire one. Although it says that there isn’t a 12cm clearance under the bed for the hoist - so I’m unsure how this works.
The bathroom has an accessible toilet seat and fixed grab bars, with a step-free shower and wall-mounted chair. The shower is also wheelchair accessible.
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The Ace hotel has a room titled “Accessible”, and it’s really easy to book. If you have any questions regarding accessibility, they welcome you to email reservations.syd@acehotel.com. Here’s the features that I could find:
Wheelchair accessible shower.
Rooms come with an accessible, multi-use table.
Approx. 24-35 square metres/255–380 square feet.
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The W Hotel is one of my favourites in Sydney, however I haven’t been there with a disabled client yet, and because it’s so new - there’s not many reviews available. I would recommend heading to their website, as they have a page with all the accessible rooms available. From what I can see, the features are:
Hotel and lobby has wheelchair access.
There are mobility accessible rooms.
Accessible rooms have roll-in showers.
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The Kimpton Margot Hotel welcomes and accommodates guests with accessibility requirements, including wheelchair accessibility. I would suggest calling them to confirm on +61 2 8027 8000. There’s no option to email though, which is frustrating. They have one room, the “King Bed Accessible” room that features:
Roll-in shower.
Accessible bathroom with grab bars.
The hotel also features:
Accessible pathway to hotel entrance, with an accessible entrance.
The registration desk and concierge is wheelchair accessible.
Accessible route to elevators.
There is a restaurant on premises that is wheelchair accessible, including accessible bathrooms.
Accessible Restaurant Recommendations.
Accessible Restaurant Recommendations.
If you’re anything like me, eating out and enjoying delicious food is a great pleasure. I’ve compiled a list of beautiful restaurants that are also wheelchair accessible. However, I’m very keen to try any spot that you love and frequently visit too. This list is here in case you’re stuck for options, or are curious about the type of food I enjoy! Please keep in mind that I’m not responsible for the restaurant’s accessibility, and contacting them ahead of time to confirm your accessibility needs is recommended.
Oncore by Clare Smyth | Barangaroo
Saint Peter | Paddington
Abode | Darling Harbour
Babylon Rooftop | Sydney CBD
Lotus in the Gardens | Darling Harbour
This list isn’t extensive, it’s just a small sample of some options. If you are a wheelchair user and have any feedback regarding the following recommendations (or have more/different options), please get in touch as I am keen to expand this list and make it as accurate as possible.